A Face Only A Mother Could Love?

When we heard that the Sonoma-Marin Fair was having a World's Ugliest Dog Contest, we just had to check it out for ourselves. There are so many things wrong with this concept that I don't know where to start.

First of all, we wouldn't have a 'world's ugliest human' contest, would we? Nooo. As Americans, it is our duty to smile, lie through our (Creststrip whitened) teeth, and teach our children the lyrics to "Everything is Beautiful." When we really need to sound off about the less than pleasing aesthetic of a fellow human being, we go visit Perez Hilton. And that's not even that bad, because those people are usually ugly on the inside, not the outside. Plus, it's not like we know them personally.

Even more disturbing, most of the dogs competing for the venerable 'ugliest' title happen to be Chinese Cresteds. A tad breedist, perhaps? Just because you happen to be hairless except for your mohawk does not make you unattractive. If it did, why would everyone be swooning over Emo boys?

Bottom line is, all dogs are cute. They're dogs. C'mon.